True love! That feeling of warmth, tenderness, passion, desire. The sentiment that is unconditional, irrespective of good times or bad. It seems like something everyone wants.
It is almost funny then, how few people know what true love actually is.
Difference Between True Love and Infatuation or What is True Love?
True love takes time to blossom. What you experience in the first year or so of a relationship is infatuation and sexual attraction. But once the sparks settle and the bursts of infatuation start to fade, the first arguments and the first few misunderstandings, start to enter the picture. This is the point where most couples start to drift away emotionally and may even end up breaking up because they feel that they are incompatible.
But every once in a while, we find someone that we keep coming back to. Where we truly understand the person and the arguments only make us stronger. That, my friends, is true love.
If you’re in a relationship where both of you truly understand each other and feel compatible with each other, and most importantly, love each other, chances are, you’re experiencing true love already.
Characteristics and Signs of True Love (Real Signs of True Love in a Relationship)
#1. You Know How to Overcome Relationship Setbacks
All relationships feel perfect during the honeymoon period. But once that draws to a close, we begin to see the cracks in the wall. We are increasingly aware of our partner's flaws. Sticking together even when problems, arguments and disagreements happen, is all the indicator you need of having found something special. It shows that you have the ability to overcome whatever problems life throws at your relationship. You know then that you've found something worth holding on to.
#2. True Relationship is Selfless
Relationships are all about, give and take. When you invest your time and energy in a relationship, you expect it to be reciprocated by the other person. If they don’t, you find yourself starting to detach from that person. However, once you have found true love you can give wholeheartedly without expecting anything in return. You give because you want to and not because you want them to do the same for you. There is no anticipation of a reward. The good thing is, they feel the same way and are giving their all too!
#3. You lose all sense of time
After scientists, the main takers of Einstein’s theory of relativity are people in true love. Time seems so distorted to you when it comes to him. When you are with him, hours feel like seconds. You could spend the entire day together and still want more. In his absence, you might lie down in bed thinking about him, and it only seems like a few minutes when in reality you might have spent more than an hour. On the other hand, a day without that person feels like it just doesn’t end. You may even feel physically restless.
#4. True Love Means Pure Bliss
Have you ever looked at someone when they’re doing the most mundane thing like reading the newspaper or drinking their coffee and thought ‘I just really love you’? True love feels a lot like that. Just watching this special person smile or laugh out loud fills you with intense happiness. Even if you’re suffering or having a bad day, a simple text from this person is enough to make your world feel better.
#5. You accept each other’s flaws
In the beginning, when everything is hunky dory, you might not be able to see any flaws in the person at all. You may think he is the most perfect man to ever have existed. However, with the passage of time, however, when that stage has passed, you do recognize and realize that your beloved is neither godly nor flawless. True love happens when you see their not-so-pretty parts and decide to love them anyway. These flaws are accepted without complaints and if necessary, compromises are consciously made.
#6. In True Love You cannot stay angry for too long
Like every relationship, yours too has its fair share of fights. And that is healthy. But what determines whether you have found true love or not is how you make up after the fight. You manage to ensure that rather than break you, these experiences make you stronger in your relationship. If you’re willing to make things work even after a quarrel and you both don’t mind putting your ego aside to apologise, it is a clear sign that you value the relationship and would rather lose an argument than lose the person.
#7. Your family and friends are in the know
One of the indications that a relationship is getting serious is when you let each other into your own worlds. When he introduces you to his family and closest of friends it directly translates to the fact that he is proud to have you as his girlfriend. Besides, this is also a sign that his intentions with you are pure. He really wants you to be a part of his life for good.
#8. True Lovers have fun while doing nothing at all
True love should feel like a pair of sweatpants. It has an altogether different comfort level. When a relationship is based on true love, there is no constant pressure to constantly keep doing something special for each other. You spend time together because you love being with them, not because you enjoy what you're doing. If you can enjoy silence as much as a conversation with them, you're indeed very lucky!
#9. Share to show you care
Sharing is a big part of a true relationship. They’re the first ones to receive important news in your life, good or bad. Your happiness does not seem complete until you have shared it with your beloved. You are willing to share all your possessions with him. You do not think twice about compromising on your needs if you feel the needs of your partner are not fulfilled.
#10. True Lovers are willing to change
Whether you actually change or not is immaterial. What truly matters is the willingness to work on yourselves to make the relationship work. If he acknowledges that it's him who sometimes makes problems and he's willing to change that, you can be sure that he is someone who really loves you and someone who will fight to save his relationship with you. If he's ready to be a better man for you, you already have the perfect man by your side.
#11. True Love means chase continues
This is especially true for men. It is very common that men stop going the extra mile after they've got you to say 'yes'. But when love is true, he'd continue to do what he did to win you and that is how he will never lose you.
#12. You’re there for each other
Your true love is always going to be by your side when you need him to. He is your 3 am phone call when you need to talk and they'll do whatever it takes to help you get over what is bothering you and make you feel better. They aren't half-hearted about being there for you. They always make you their priority.
#13. You still feel like teenagers in love
After years, if you both still can’t keep your hands off each other, that's a clear sign that you two cannot live without each other. Relationships tend to get monotonous as the years pass by so it's imperative to continue to find each other attractive and to keep the passion alive. While making the spark last for years on end is challenging.
If you still behave as teenagers around each other, you flirt with him (her) and he/she does things to make you happy, it is a clear sign that you are really compatible and that you shouldn't be worried about things getting boring.
#14. If he is vulnerable around you, he is in true love
Let’s face it, no-one enjoys crying in front of other people. But when you intend to share your life with someone, it is important that you’re able to reveal your not so pretty parts. If you and your partner are freely able to discuss your problems and insecurities without hesitation or fear of vulnerability, congratulations! You are with “the one,” or at least with someone that you feel wholly comfortable with. Crying is hard but if you can cry without feeling embarrassed, you are with the right person for you.
#15. You’ve stopped wondering if there’s someone better out there for you
As much as we’d like our first loves to be our one true love, it rarely is the case. Most of us have kissed a lot of frogs before finding our prince. As a natural consequence, it is normal to question oneself about whether we have found the one or we are just settling. It is awfully common to wonder if there is something better out there even when we are in a perfectly happy and fulfilling relationship. But when true love enters the picture, you stop thinking like that. You know this is the real deal. This is as good as it gets.
#16. He knows you like you know him
You can look at him and know exactly what he is thinking about. He can totally predict how you would react to something. If you know all of each other's flaws and darkest thoughts, it means that you truly accept each other as you are. Knowing someone completely and still loving them without trying to change them is one important part of true love.
#17. You can’t help but smile
Have you ever noticed how the person you are with bursts into a grin when they see you? It’s like they can’t help but smile when they see you. This means that their love for you is simply too much to contain and it spills out whenever you are even remotely close to them. Chances are you feel the same way about them, smiling like a goofball when they are around.
#18. True Lovers are proud of each other
You’re each other’s home team. You’re each other’s biggest cheerleaders. Having people in your life that will always root for you to succeed is incredibly important. If your loved one is constantly encouraging you, supporting you, and almost literally standing on the sidelines cheering for you-you know you’ve found a keeper.
#19. True Lovers are friends first
In long-term relationships, it gets very easy to forget that you were friends first. If you still share opinions on most things, seek each other’s advice and provide unconditional support in whatever the other person wants to do, you still have kept the most integral part of your relationship intact - your friendship. There's no true love without friendship so consider yourself lucky if you have your best friend in your partner.
#20. True Lovers never get bored of each other
Even after knowing each other for years and finding out everything there is to know, you continue to fascinate each other. You can talk to each other every day and not get tired of listening. They constantly amuse and amaze you. What more can you ask for, really?
#21. The world seems a better place
No, poverty didn’t disappear. Nor did Global warming end. The problems of the world are still around. It is just your perception and point of view that changes. With love comes more self-confidence and courage, allowing you to face the world with increased vigour. And no matter what the world outside is like, your little world definitely is a happy place.
True love can’t be forced. It has to be experienced naturally and wholeheartedly. You can’t fake it no matter how hard you try. If a couple fails to overcome the itch at the end of their infatuation stage, it’s pretty hard for both of them to ever experience true love.
On the other hand, if both partners can understand each other and relate to each other, use arguments to make their bond stronger, they’ll start to love each other’s company and start to become inseparable. Eventually, this bond will turn into a pure and selfless love that we call true love.
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